http://majik.id.au

I gave blood. I was scared stiff. I nearly burst into tears on the way in to the nurse’s office to sort out the paperwork. But when I was in the chair she explained how the rocker worked and what the tubes were for (and then afterwards I messaged Mum and found out what the different coloured tubes meant) and I have good veins so it only took one jab. I don’t think I’ll be scared next time, but once the nurse has explained how it all works and you’ve small-talked about the weather, there’s nothing to do but stare around the room or out the window.

Have to wait three months before going back. And I really will go back. Turns out I’m not a chicken.

*nay*

I need to update that- I did a class presentation on the life and music of Peter Sculthorpe on Tuesday. I didn’t have musical exerpts of the two main works that I analysed, but I did find some exerpts of an interview that he did a short while ago which gave a really good “in his own words” insight into his inspiration and up-bringing. And, being the teacher that I am, I drew a quick diagram on the white-board of Australia to give a visual demonstration of the places I talked about- Launceston Tasmania, Port Essington Northern Territory, and Canberra ACT. I spoke too quickly, but by breaking it up with the video extracts the lecturer was mightily impressed. And there were handouts- just a sheet of paper showing bits and pieces Sculthorpe has collected over his life. I told the class that if I got too boring they could pass the time by folding it into a paper aeroplane- not one missile ensued, so I have to assume thats a good thing.

I went in thinking “I have to say this, and you all have to listen. So there.” Hell, they even clapped a bit.

The slimey Canadian, whom I have complained about heartily on more than one occasion, is no more. His employment was terminated today. My heart does not bleed, and I feel no remorse for this post.

In fact, ’bout time.

Thankyou, new GM. Damn breath of fresh air.
*nay*

And they said they wanted O and A and one of those is me, and then they said the phone number so I rang it and I didn’t hang up when someone answered, and she asked a bunch of questions and I said no to everything which turns out to be a good thing, and then all of a sudden I have an appointment.

On Saturday 21st Oct at 9:15am, I’m giving BLOOD! When I said I was O+ the girl sounded like a hungry vampire.

They have big needles! I don’t like big needles. I don’t like small ones either. It’s not as big a phobia as my one about arachnids, but I’ve never had one without my Mum there. Holy Crap.

I think the moral of the story is: If I feel so low that self-harm seems the only way out, why not let someone benefit from the experience? And this way I don’t actually have to stick myself.

I just hope I don’t chicken out and cancel before then. Rob’s coming for moral support but he doesn’t want to donate. It could be hard to drive home if we’ve both fainted. But it’s not the same if there isn’t another person with a needle in their arm too.

Back to the washing. Riveting stuff, I know.

So much can happen.

We have a gorgeous little budgie named Peach, who is watching me from atop the air con just now.

I’m working constantly, with a day off only to go to Uni- and even then we are so short-staffed that I occasionally go back in after class. There’s a fair amount of politics happening there just now too, making for an interesting work environment.

I bought a new toy- a WACOM tablet and pen for photo editing and digital art- and only got to take it out of the box. I still haven’t used it properly yet.

I should have started dancing again over a month ago, but ended up spending so much time at work that I haven’t even been to one class.

It looks as though I’m stuck in my angsty-posting-rut again. I can’t see the point of anything, there’s nothing in my day-to-day slog that makes me happy, nothing inspires me to do anything else and I have no self-motivation left. I feel as though there’s no reason for me to be here, and there’d be virtually no gap left behind if I wasn’t. Experience says that when this wears off I’ll feel incredibly stupid about it all, but its real for now.